What Do You Do?

As an unemployed individual, this is one of the hardest questions to be asked.  It seems to come up a lot. What do you do? I awkwardly fumble through my words rambling about my past job and how now I am doing freelance photography. Usually my response doesn't seem sufficient enough. That could be my own insecurities talking. But as I look back at the person who asked me this question, a new acquaintance, an old classmate, a family friend, or an old coworker I feel unfulfilled. I feel as though my answer about photography, how I am in between jobs right now, and how I am still "finding myself" doesn't seem like enough. I often get a sad look in return and a comment such as "Oh don't worry, you'll figure it out."  I know I shouldn't fret over what others think about me. I know what I have accomplished, I know I have free spirited habits, and I know that I fill my days with things that make me thrive.

What I want to know is why we hold such an importance on what we do for a living? It is a big part of our life and the means for our livelihood but why let that be our value?  Some judgmental comments have left me feeling of lesser value because I am out of work right now.  I've reminded myself that this does not define who I am.  I am surviving self sufficiently on money I previously earned, I'm not living off the system, I am working towards a better me, and I am figuring out my own path.

One day I walked into an Indian store in Providence, RI. The owner was an older gentlemen. We engaged in conversation and he asked me a question. He didn't ask me what I do for work. He asked me "What are you passionate about?" I was intrigued by this question. It wasn't related to what I do for work now it was related to what makes me happy. I thought about my response and we conversed for a while about my passions in life. He then said to me, well then find a way to do that. Fill your time with those things. He even told me to come back once I was fulfilling those dreams. He wanted to hear all about it. He wasn't interested in what I am doing for work now or if I was unemployed. He was engaged by the passion that fills me. After leaving his store I was feeling inspired. I didn't feel depleted from our conversation. I wasn't worried that I wasn't doing what I felt I should be doing in life.  I left the conversation ready to take on the world.

This encounter reminded me of a quote I once read by Howard Thurman, "Don't ask yourself what the world needs; ask yourself what makes you come alive. And then go and do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive."

So if you are working what seems like a dead end job, if you are unemployed, if you are unhappy with your profession, don't let the judgment of others be a thought on your mind.  Don't let it define your value.

Ask yourself, what is your passion, what makes you come alive? Then go do that!

The Start of a New Journey

My younger cousin recently started a blog related to her life as a Freshmen in college.  It has inspired me to join the blogging world.  The reason I started this blog was to talk my way through some confusion I have been feeling in life lately. I hope to find a few people out there that can relate to what I am going through. If you are reading this, awesome, and thank you! At the very least it will be a place for to me to sort through my own thoughts and maybe (hopefully) figure a few things out.

Where to begin? Well in a nut shell, I am 24, went to college for marketing, have always strived to succeed, got a job right out of school using my degree, decided this wasn't my path, quit, traveled, moved to Colorado, came back home, broke up with my boyfriend, and now here I am. Phew! Single, back home, and jobless.  This is where the confusion comes in and what we call a quarter life crisis.

I have always felt a need to please others. I was a go-getter in school and tried to make my family proud. I was the girl overly involved in every club, class president, an A student, basically the over achiever.  I went through the motions in life, stayed on the right track, and mostly did what I was told. Now I am at a crossroad in life, stuck between going down the path I envision for myself or turning around and doing what others see for my future.

I am a wandering soul, nothing ignites my passion like travel. Nothing excites me like emerging myself in a new land, with new people, new food, and new experiences. There is just so much to see in this world. My mentality is why not try to see it all. Many do not see eye to eye with this theory.  I am told to grow up, get a job, use my degree, settle down.  That's what you are suppose to do after college, right? Get a "real job", get married, and have kids. But what if that isn't the path for me? My heart says otherwise. I want to explore, travel, help people, experience new things. Call me crazy but I think I can change the world. Maybe I can't change the whole world but I can change enough to make an impact, enough to leave my footprint on earth.

So here you go! This is the introduction of my blog designed to help figure out my 20's and all the questions, excitement, judgement, heartache, risks, and wonderful opportunities it has to offer. Buckle up, it's going to be a bumpy ride.